Math doesn’t lie.
So I looked into this Razzie thingy. Sounds like a fruit cocktail but it is an apparent award for they say “the worst in film” by respected judges.
On their website you can join to be Judge! Holy shit, for $40 I could actually use my credit card to be a one! So I joined (I didn’t want the INNER SANCTUM membership for $75, because it sounds too much like Rectum). The $100 one for “GUARANTEED ANONYMITY” sounds kind of cool for the pure Internet lifer-hater-living-their-whole-life-behind-a-computer-wishing-they-could-of-done-something-other-then-hate-the-ones-that-are-doing. But the price was steep.
I’m a judge now $40 bucks with a newsletter included. I must say the Razzie Reporter Newsletter rocks!
So here’s the math, made by a young PA in the office:
- Directed nine movies
- One movie tanked at the box office
- 4th Highest Grossing Director of All Time according to BoxOffice Mojo
- Youngest age in the top ten Grossing directors according to Boxoffice Mojo
- Bay most likely has received the most Razzie nominations as a director ever has
- Transformers Dark of the Moon: 140 million people around the world attended
- Transformers Dark of the Moon box-office $1.123 billion dollars.
- Transformers Dark of the Moon received 7 Noms this year
- Transformers Dark of the Moon is 4th highest grossing movie of All Time (the last Harry Potter is 3rd , and last Lord of the Rings is 5th).
- The next most attended movie Nominee is Jack and Jill, 4.2 million people.
- Transformers Dark of the Moon made $1.20 billion more dollars then the next Nominee Jack and Jill
- Number of Razzie Judges: 423
- Razzie Judges with Emperor packages: 13 (not sure what special shit they get)
Okay so now…
430 judges vote + 140 million people saw it + 712 Paramount Studio employees are smiling = 1 Very Happy Director
Film School Reject’s Robert Fure:
Achievement in Sound Editing
Hugo wins here, which is stupid. Drive was nominated because it was loud and realistic, but I don’t think that overcomes Transformers: Dark of the Moon, which created an amazing and realistic immersive experience that was well thought out. Say what you will about the movie or Bay, but the film is cutting edge and sounded amazing.
Achievement in Sound Mixing
Again, Hugo doesn’t hold a candle to Transformers. The action film is ignored because it’s perceived as being big, loud, and stupid, when it is actually big, loud, and technically crafted amazingly in several departments. Hate the film, you can’t ignore the layers of sound work here.
Achievement in Visual Effects + This is What’s Wrong with the Oscars Part 2
The childish Hugo again wins, inexplicably. I don’t think Deathly Hallows had the consistency in its effects work to win here. Many were cheering Rise of the Planet of the Apes, but I don’t think that wins here either – what was the achievement? More facial mocap? Big whoop. The technology being utilized here is Lord of the Rings stuff plus the hair texturing of King Kong. It’s not groundbreaking. I liked Real Steel, which had some pretty great effects, but the king of the pile here is Transformers: Dark of the Moon.
This is again what’s wrong with the Oscar’s. They don’t want to give Transformers an Academy Award, despite the fact that it is utterly amazing visually. Michael Bay has a bad reputation in some professional circles and a lot of people consider him to be a bad director – so what? This isn’t about good people and this category actually isn’t about “good” movies. Transformers is at least competent in every department, but when it comes to visual effects, this film is retardedly amazing. The robots move more realistically than the apes in Rise, and they seamlessly interact with the physical environment. The effects are blended perfectly.
Further, the film breaks ground in processing power and what’s possible on the screen. Each of the Transformers is made up of hundreds, if not tens of thousands, of pieces that are animated. There was a time when just putting one of those guys on screen was impossible, yet now a battle can rage with dozens of Transformers fighting dozens of flying vehicles while buildings collapse in the background. This just isn’t about the robots, it’s about the entire digital landscape collapsing around them. Dark of the Moon was fucking robbed.
FIRST UP FOR THE PROLIFIC FILMMAKER IS “PAIN AND GAIN” STARRING MARK WAHLBERG AND DWAYNE “THE ROCK” JOHNSON, FOLLOWED BY A NEW INSTALLMENT IN THE HUGELY POPULAR “TRANSFORMERS ” FRANCHISE, TO BE RELEASED ON JUNE 29TH, 2014
HOLLYWOOD, CA (February 13, 2012) – Paramount Pictures announced today that director Michael Bay has signed a two-picture deal with the studio, which will commence this spring with the filming of “Pain and Gain,” and will be followed by the next installment in the hit “Transformers” franchise.
Based on a true story, “Pain and Gain” follows a group of bodybuilders who engaged in a campaign of kidnapping, extortion and murder in Florida. First told in an article from the Miami New Times, “Pain and Gain,” will be directed by Bay and will star Mark Wahlberg and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Expected to begin production in early spring, the movie’s producers include Bay, Donald De Line and Ian Bryce.
Following “Pain and Gain,” Bay will bring audiences a new take on the “Transformers” franchise as he begins production on the fourth installment in the hit series of movies based on the best-selling Hasbro toyline. The third, and most recent installment of the franchise, “Transformers: Dark of the Moon,” is the fourth highest global grossing film of all time with 1.124 billion dollars of worldwide box office success. Directed by Bay, the movie will re-unite the filmmaking team from the hit franchise, including producers Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Don Murphy, Tom DeSanto and Ian Bryce; and executive producers Steven Spielberg, Bay, Brian Goldner and Mark Vahradian. Paramount Pictures will release the film on June 27th, 2014.
“Michael has been working on PAIN AND GAIN for a number of years but has patiently waited for the perfect casting to trigger a start,” said Adam Goodman, President of Paramount’s Film Group. “Clearly his patience has paid off as we couldn’t be more excited about this combo. His passion for this project is just awesome.”
To clarify uninformed reports coming out of Toy Fair – Steven Spielberg and I are working on a whole new re imagining of Transformers, the fourth installment. We have been working on the idea for a few months. I’m excited about where it’s headed. But first I’m doing a small $20 million dollar edgy black comedy of a true crime story set in Miami called “Pain and Gain,” staring Mark Wahlberg and Dwanye Johnson, and very close to signing on a couple other great actors. I’m extremely excited to simplify my film career this spring with a great character piece.
That starts filming at the end of March. I might then jump onto a very cool television show my company Platinum Dunes is selling to a major cable network. It might be my first pilot I might potentially direct. We are still working out the details of the deal.